Thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Thank you for saving me from a day full of embarrassment.
Yesterday I had the the most embarrassing moment that I have had since throwing up on a cute boys locker in middle school. I picked up C from his dad’s early yesterday morning. We had some time to spare, so we stopped by Starbucks for some breakfast (and coffee of course!) C and I walked through the door, and there is a woman standing to left, who as I walk by stares at my midsection. She had this complete look of disgust on her face, like there was poo smeared all over me or something. At first I didn’t really think much about it. When C and I got in line though, I happened to look down at the area that she was staring at because, who knows, maybe I did get poo smeared on me somehow.
OH.MY.GAWD…It was worse than poo. It was my hip fat, exposed for all of the world to see. Conveniently, and so attractively, separated into 2 lovely blobs of blubber by the string of my underwear. Somewhere between zipping up my skirt and walking into Starbucks, the zipper of my side-zip skirt had somehow broken. The skirt was still connected at the top, but all 8 inches of the zipper had separated for all of the world to see.
All I have to say is thank you to the fashion industry for adding the extra few inches you have been recently to the bottom of tunics. It really saves the day if your zipper happened to break while you are going about your morning! And to the woman who glared at me…I’m sorry if I traumatized you for the rest of the day. I can’t imagine that was a pretty thing to see before you’ve even had your coffee…send me the bill if you need therapy!
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